I thoroughly enjoy dipping a piece of warm, crusty bread into that delicious sauce, that common escort to escargot which drips in garlicky goodness.  The snails, on the other hand, are a different story.  I just cannot stand them.  I dislike the texture, the flavor and the idea of eating snails.  I am still attempting to wrap my head around the latter since I will happily and eagerly eat sushi (including eel) and oysters on the half shell.  Nonetheless, I found myself craving that toothsome escargot sauce (commonly what can be called a New Orleans style bordelaise, which is a basic sauce consisting of either clarified butter or olive oil, garlic and chopped parsley).  Incidentally, I had all the ingredients for the sauce on hand.  Also, I had just purchased a freshly baked grand mange blanc (a massive loaf of crusty white bread measuring about 3 feet in length and 8″ in width), and I needed something in which to dip it.  I was already planning on preparing my mussels in spicy garlic tomato sauce, but I still craved that escargot sauce! 

I had all of the ingredients for my bordelaise on hand, as well as a tin of smoked oysters, so I thought I’d try out the combination.  The idea seemed rather silly to me since escargot is considered to be somewhat elegant, while smoked oysters are something my grandfather would have eaten on saltine crackers along with his potted meat and canned Vienna (pronounced “Vie-eeena” by him) sausages.  Nonetheless, necessity breeds creativity, and I needed that sauce!

Surprisingly, the end result was a delicious dish, topped with a dusting of grated Parmesan cheese.  The smoked oysters took on a black hue in the oven and firmed up to a texture not very far from escargots.  Even my finnicky husband enjoyed it.  The best thing about this dish was that the entire preparation and cooking process took about 15 minutes.   

The recipe is below.  Keep in mind that while I used olive oil for my sauce, clarified butter may be used, as well, and smoked mussels can be a nice alternative to the oysters.

Smoked Oysters Bordelaise

INGREDIENTS:

1 tin of smoked oysters, drained

2 medium cloves of elephant garlic, finely minced or pushed through a garlic press 
               *I recommend the garlic press  since it releases oil from the garlic.

2/3 cup extra virgin olive oil (or clarified butter)

2 tablespoons fresh, chopped parsley

2 tablespoons grated parmesan (NOT from a can)

DIRECTIONS:
For those in the UK with a fan-forced oven, preheat to 180° C.  A conventional gas or electric oven should be preheated to 375° F. 

In a small casserole dish (or two smaller, personal dishes), evenly distribute the drained oysters.  Top with pressed garlic and chopped parsley.  Pour olive oil over everything and sprinkle with Parmesan cheese. 

In fan-forced oven, bake for 7-10 minutes, or until oil is bubbling and cheese has browned slightly.  In conventional oven, bake for 10-12 minutes (I think– I am now cooking with a convection oven so I cannot be absolutely certain about this.  Just keep an eye on it!)

Serve straight out of casserole dish with your favorite crusty bread for dipping.  Serves 1 very generous portions or 2 appetizer sized portions.

Sometimes, a friend or family member unexpectedly drops by for a visit and it happens to be lunch time.  On the other hand, perhaps we crave a filling and tasty meal that is quick, does not require much clean up afterwards, and which offers enough variety that our dear spouses and/or children will not complain about it.  Either way, this means we need to be able to quickly whip up something that will be satisfying and hassle free.   

Living in the UK has introduced me to the joys of afternoon tea and the little finger sandwiches that accompany it.  I am omitting and shall not go into detail about the deliciously warm scones, Cornish clotted cream and strawberry jam that are also a part of afternoon tea, since these are not the most figure flattering and health conscious items one may consume, and I am watching my caloric intake.   

A quick and nicely presented afternoon tea can be made with just a few ingredients from ones pantry:  mainly,  bread, a cucumber, some cream cheese, two tomatoes, boiled eggs, a can of tuna, some mayonnaise, and some of the fish seasoning that all grocery stores stock on the spice aisle.  The dill, onion and lemon in fish seasoning adds a fresh and savory element to the sandwiches without the need to chop fresh dill, extract fresh lemon juice and finely chop or puree onion. 

Below are fast and easy recipes for tasty sandwiches that are pretty enough to be served on china (if, say, the mother-in-law should pop in):

Eggsellent Egg Salad Sandwiches with Peppery Watercress and Vine Ripened Tomatoes

Ingredients:
Hard boiled egg (allow one egg per person/sandwich)
Mayonnaise (approx. 3/4 tablespoon per egg) (Hellman’s Light is recommended)
Fish seasoning
One bunch watercress (chopped fresh parsley may be substituted)
Tomatoes (allow 1/2 large tomato per person), thinly sliced
Salt
Ground black pepper
Sliced bread or rolls of choice

To make the egg salad, peel and finely mash egg with whisk, fork or small potato masher.  I prefer to use Mashy the Egg Masher by Jo!e.

Mashy the Egg Masher

Add mayo and a dash of fish seasoning to taste.  Mix well. 

To assemble the sandwiches, spread the egg salad onto a slice of bread.  Top egg salad with a few sprigs of watercress or a thin layer of chopped, fresh parsley.  Lightly salt and pepper the tomato slices and place atop the green layer.  Spread a thin layer of mayonnaise on the slice of bread to top off the sandwich.  Cut sandwiches in half to display the colorful layers.   

Cool Cucumber Sandwiches

Ingredients:
Cucumber, thinly sliced, approx. 1/16″
Cream cheese, softened (approx. 1/4 cup per sandwich)
Fish seasoning
Italian seasoning
Sliced bread of choice

Remove crusts from bread.  I prefer to use a water glass to cut out circular shaped, crustless slices for a more uniform presentation. 

In a small bowl, add a dash of fish seasoning and Italian seasoning, to taste.  Mix well and spread a generous layer onto both/all slices of bread to be used for sandwich(es). 

To assemble sandwich(es), simply place a single layer of cucumbers between the bread slices.  Salt and pepper may be added to cucumber, if desired. 

Colorful Tuna Melt Canapés

Ingredients:
[NOTE:  This recipe makes 4 canapes on 4" diameter Finncrisp crisp breads.]
1 can tuna in water, drained
2 tablespoons capers
1/4 red onion, finely chopped
1 stalk celery, finely chopped
3 tablespoons mayonnaise (Hellman’s Light is recommended)
Fish seasoning
Shredded cheddar/mozzarella cheese mix
4 Ryvita crisp breads (or crackers or bread of choice)

Preheat oven to 350 F.  In a bowl, combine all ingredients (except bread/crackers) and mix well.  Generously top crisp breads with tuna salad, and then top with 1-2 tablespoons of shredded cheese. 

Place canapes onto non-stick baking tray and bake at 350 for a few minutes, until cheese is melted. 

Serve immediately. 

Serve these sandwiches with a steaming pot of your favorite tea, or if you are in the south, a tall, cool pitcher of iced tea.

There is a drink popular in coffee houses throughout the United States and United Kingdom referred “chai.” One can purchase a “chai tea” or “chai latte” in any Starbucks or similar establishment around the world. Heck, it can even be found at small cappuccino stands in the lobbies of office buildings. I was first turned on to this sumptuously sweet, spiced tea back in 1999 when I worked in a law firm in the AmSouth Plaza in downtown Jackson, Mississippi. I have loved this exotic tasting beverage ever since, though for years I had no idea what was even it and what gave it that flavor I couldn’t describe. I knew it contained cinnamon and milk, but that was all I knew.

When I moved to London, I found that Indian food is more prevalent and perfected here than probably anywhere else in the world, including India, and that was when I learned that this spiced tea is an infusion of Assam tea, cinnamon, cardamom, cloves and black pepper. This tasty treat is best made from scratch and not with those ready-made “chai” tea bags or those “chai flavored” instant powders.

First of all, referring to this drink as “chai tea” is the same as calling it “tea tea,” since the word chai actually means “tea.” The correct name is masala chai, and I believe once someone makes this delightful drink oneself, plain old hot tea will never be up to snuff again.

The traditional method of concocting masala chai is to bring the teabags, spices and water to a boil and then to add an equal part milk and copious amounts of sugar, and slowly simmer until the mixture becomes a nice caramel color. The tea is then strained into a teapot or into individual cups and served. This, of course, is the best preparation method, but who always has 15-20 minutes to invest standing over a pot for one cup of tea? I know I don’t. Therefore, I have played around with the ratio of spices that are required per cup and have found that the spices and tea bags can be added to an individual mug along with boiling water and then covered to steep, with the milk and sugar added just before serving. Although this brew is not as strong and does not have the caffeine kick of the simmered version, the flavors still fuse together quite nicely.

To make your own cup of quick masala chai, do the following:

1. Put water on to boil.

2. Place two tea bags (preferably a dark tea such as Assam) into a coffee mug, along with 2 cardamom pods, 2 cloves, 1 black peppercorn, and about 1/2 inch of a cinnamon stick.  If you have a tea ball, place the spices into it to save time when fishing them out before serving.

3. Pour boiling water over tea bags and spices, filling up the mug up to approximately 1″ from the top. Cover mug with a saucer and let steep for 3 to 5 minutes.

4. Heat about 1/2 cup of milk in the microwave on high power for 30-60 seconds.

4. Remove tea bags and spices with a spoon and add heated milk. Add sugar to taste (I use 3 teaspoons of Splenda).

Voila! Now you’ve got a steaming hot cup of masala chai. Sit back and enjoy!

NOTE: Use the darkest tea leaves you can find. The tea needs to be dark and strong so that the spices do not overpower the flavor of the tea. Also, whole milk is recommended, but 2% can be used. Skim milk will not work at all in this tea since some amount of cream is needed to balance out the spices.

This recipe is so simple and good it will make you want to slap your mama!  Be sure to have lots of pasta or french bread on hand to soak up the extra sauce.  You’ll be sorry if you don’t!

Ingredients:
1 bag live mussels
3 cloves elephant garlic
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 large can (approx.  4 cups) tomato purée
1.5 cup white wine
1/2 teaspoon salt (more or less, to taste)
2 tablespoons red pepper flakes (one for milder flavor– this dish is spicy!)

Instructions:
Heat olive oil in large stock pot with heavy bottom.  Peel garlic and finely chop or run through garlic press.  Sauté garlic until slightly browned, about 2 minutes.  Add tomato purée, white wine, salt and red pepper flakes.  Bring to a boil, reduce heat to low and cover.  Simmer for about 10 minutes, stirring a few times.  Now would be a good time to prepare your pasta or toast your bread. 

Remove lid from pot and increase heat to medium-high.  When liquid returns to a boil, add mussels.  Cover with lid and steam for about 5-6 minutes.  When all of the mussel shells are open, remove them from the sauce with a slotted spoon and set aside.  Continue to cook sauce on high heat, stirring frequently, until reduced almost in half.  Spoon sauce over mussels (and pasta).  Top with grated parmesan cheese.  Enjoy!

Serves 4 with pasta, 2 without pasta.

This quick dish will delight the senses of taste, smell and sight with aromatic spices and vibrant green pea purée. 

Ingredients:
1 lb. fresh sea scallops
1 teaspoon curry powder
1/4 teaspoon salt (or less, to taste)
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon ground coriander
2 tablespoons oil or butter

2 cups frozen green peas
1/2 – 3/4 cup heavy whipping cream
1 1/2 tablespoon dried mint
pinch salt
pinch pepper (white or black)

Directions:
Steam green peas on stovetop or place in microwave safe bowl, cover with plate or plastic wrap and microwave on high for about 8 minutes. 

Heat oil in nonstick pan over medium-high heat (only use 1 tablespoon oil/butter for nonstick; 2 tablespoon for regular pan).  Meanwhile, rinse scallops in cold water and pat dry with paper towel.  Mix together curry powder, salt, chili powder and coriander and dust tops and bottoms of scallops.  When oil is hot, sear scallops over medium-high heat, about 3 minutes on each side.

Strain water from peas and place peas in food processor.  Add salt, pepper, mint and about 1/4 cup of cream and pulse until peas begin to puree.  Add remainder of cream, a little at a time, and pulse until desired consistency is reached (the purée should not be soupy). 

Spoon pea purée onto plate and spread to cover about 3/4 of the surface of the plate.  Top with seared scallops. 

Serve with parsleyed carrots and/or angel hair pasta tossed with olive oil, grated parmesan and garlic powder on the side. 

Serves 2.

Virtuôse Mascara

As a follow-up to my article titled “Best Mascara Ever,” I first must confess that I strayed from the path of trying out the Firebird mascara that was recommended by Sephora.  The Lancôme counter at Macy’s is closer than the local Sephora store, so I stopped by to see what’s new on the mascara end.  The sales lady did not have much to say about the new Virtuôse and recommended I stick with my old faithful, Hypnôse, but I was feeling adventurous that day and took a chance on the Virtuôse Black Carat. 

The Virtuôse Black Carat is a waterproof, high definition, thickening, lengthening and curling mascara.  This mascara has a big lash look that is not quite as dramatic as the Hypnôse , making it more suitable for daytime wear, and there is a definite curling effect that makes the lashes appear longer.  Below is a picture of the Virtuose Black Carat applied hastily as one would during the workday morning rush, which means sans eyelash comb and curler.  You will also recognize the symbolic bloodshot eye of the cubicle monkey.

Lashes coated with Virtuôse Black Carat

Virtuôse is non-flaking, smudge proof and long lasting.  In fact, it lasts so long that it doesn’t want to come off when you wash your face at night.  This is the only con of this product and is what will make me perhaps think twice before purchasing another tube.  An oil-based, waterproof mascara remover must be used, and even that does not work so well.  I found that baby oil is the best remover for this tenacious cosmetic.

Virtuôse also comes in some fun colors, which I have yet to try:  copper, golden and platinum.

Overall, I recommend this mascara.  I’ve gotten used to the extra minute it takes to remove it at night, and it is a relatively small price to pay for a great finish and the fact that I can go through my day confident that it will not smudge or flake onto my cheek, as some volumizing mascaras do.

A favorite (and incidentally healthy) hors d’oeuvre is smoked salmon. Whenever I am at a cocktail party or reception, I head straight for this first.

Parties are not the only times we can enjoy smoked salmon, however. This pink delicacy makes a great lunch, especially for those of us watching our waistlines. You can incorporate smoked salmon, neufchâtel cheese, light sour cream, capers, dill, red onion and multi-grain crackers for a filling and refreshingly different take on lunch for any day of the week– not just a special occasion. Round off the meal with a few cornichons (the tartness is a fabulous complement to the salmon), a cup of cherry tomatoes and a couple of sweet clementine oranges for dessert, and you’ve got a great and satisfying mid-day meal for about 350 calories.

Let’s do a break-down of this luscious and surprisingly inexpensive lunch:

Smoked Salmon:
Use 2 oz of smoked salmon for your lunch portion (I know that doesn’t sound like much, but trust me– this is a lot in terms of smoked salmon).  Smoked salmon generally comes in 4 oz and 8 oz packages, with the 4 oz packages being around $7.00. 
NUTRITIONAL INFO (per 2 oz serving):  83 calories, 0 g fat, 3 g fat, 13 g protein.

Dilled Neufchâtel Caper Spread:
INGREDIENTS: 
3 oz Neufchâtel cheese, softened
4 tablespoons light sour cream
1/3 cup finely diced red onion
1/2 cup capers, drained
1/4 cup fresh dill

DIRECTIONS:  Stir all ingredients together in bowl until well blended.   Makes approx. 3 servings.

NUTRITIONAL INFO (per serving):  103 calories, 4 g carbohydrates, 8 g fat, 2 g protein.

Multi-Grain Crackers:
I recommend Kavli 5-grain crackers because they taste great and are satisfying as well as being fat-free and very low in calories.  There are two crackers per serving and the serving is about the size of a slice of sandwich bread. 
NUTRITIONAL INFO (1 serving Kavli 5-Grain):  60 calories, 11 g carbohydrates, 0 g fat, 2 g protein.

Cherry Tomatoes:
One cup of cherry tomatoes is a filling and contrasting texture and flavor to the rich smoked salmon and dilled Neufchatel caper spread.  Pair this with 2 tablespoons of your favorite dressing, if you wish.
NUTRITIONAL INFO ( 1 cup cherry tomatoes): 31 calories, 7 g carbohydrates, 0 g fat, 1 g protein.

Cornichons:
These are bitter little French gherkins that you can find in specialty stores, cheeseries, Whole Foods, and some better supermarkets.  Their tart taste complements cured and smoked meats and fish superbly.  Be sure to check the ingredients because you don’t want a cornichon with sugar in it– that makes it sweet.  The sour cornichon is best with this meal.  One serving of about 4 cornichons is about 10 calories, so feel free to eat as many of these as you like!

Clementines:
Of course, you may use any fruit for your dessert, but I prefer clementines because they’re so sweet, easy to peel and downright fun to eat.  They remind me of being a kid. 
NUTRITIONAL INFO (1 clementine):  35 calories, 7 g carbohydrates, 0 g fat, 1 g protein.

This past Saturday (September 13, to be exact), Saturday Night Live made a comeback– thanks to Tina Fey. I used to be a loyal viewer of the program, but my enjoyment became sporadic after Will Ferrell left the cast in 2002. The show just seemed to go downhill after that, though the likes of Tina Fey and Chris Kattan did offer a saving grace.

I have always been a fan of Tina Fey. For those of you who live under a rock, Tina Fey became head writer for Saturday Night Live in 1999 and was added to the cast in 2000 (best known for her “Weekly World News” segment with Jimmy Fallon and later Amy Poehler). Fey left SNL in 2006 to launch her own television show, 30 Rock, in which she is also a cast member. It is one of the best written comedies on TV to date. Also to her credit is the writing of and co-starring in the biting satire of high school girls’ social lives, Mean Girls, the 2004 film starring little miss Lindsay Lohan (this was said to be her break-out role). Mean Girls is the only teen movie I have been able to watch since I was 11 years old without wanting to vomit or shoot myself in the head.  I take that back.  It is the only movie other than The Breakfast Club.  You’ve got to love The Breakfast Club.  “Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?”  Priceless teen angst.   

I learned two days too late that Tina Fey had made a special appearance on this past Saturday’s SNL. Thanks to the internet, however, I was able to watch the sketch and I haven’t laughed so hard in years. I agree with Chevy Chase’s assessment that Fey should have been harder on Palin, but her voice, accent and mannerisms were dead-on, nonetheless.

I welcome what I assume will be a return of Tina Fey to SNL, if only temporary, and I urge you to watch the video for yourself. If you’re not already a fan of Tina Fey, this could certainly make you one.

CLICK HERE to see the “Sarah Palin” & “Hillary Clinton” Video.

 
Yes, this is one of Dan Akroyd’s quotes in the film The Blues Brothers.  Sadly, what I am actually referring to is the sentiment of Republican vice presidential nominee, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.  Gov. Palin said last week, in a speech to her former church, the Wasilla Assembly of God, that “Our national leaders are sending them [U.S. troops] out on a task that is from God… That’s what we have to make sure that we’re praying for, that there is a plan and that plan is God’s plan.” 

She also urged students to pray for another aspect of what she called “God’s will,” which is drilling for and building a $30 billion natural gas pipeline in Alaska.  According to Gov. Palin, “God’s will has to be done in unifying people and companies to get that gas line built, so pray for that.” After a decade of building, this will open up Alaska’s natural gas resources to us.  Sure, this will ease our dependence on foreign oil for a short while, but only in 10 years and only until Alaska’s resources are used up, and then we’re back at square one.  Then what?  This pipeline seems like putting a bandaid on a disarticulated head– 10 years late.  I guess it’s also God’s will for us to destroy even more of the planet and perhaps finally drive the polar bear into extinction. 

Gov. Palin has vowed to implement God’s will from the governor’s office, and she said something like developing natural resources and paving roads “…doesn’t do any good if the people of Alaska’s heart isn’t right with God.”  So,  is my heart not right with God if I don’t support big oil companies and I want to protect endangered species on the Alaskan wildlife reserves that will surely be adversely affected by building a pipeline?  Is my heart not right with God if I believe we need to seek alternative energy sources sooner rather than later? 

The big question is:  does it even matter if my ”heart isn’t right with God”?  The answer is no.    

Whatever happened to separation of church and state?  It seems the Republican party touts its closeness with God and promises to enforce His will so that it can appeal to the lowest common denominator of uneducated, religious extremist voters in America.  Unfortunately, there is a growing number of these people in our country.  We have historically seen this during times of war– growing numbers of religious zealots, not the uneducated.  Just look at World War II.  People became more religiously aware then, too, because it offered them comfort and some kind of explanation for the hardships they endured.  This isn’t just limited to the American experience, but rather is a common occurrence in all human society.  The ancient Egyptians became more religious during hard times of droughts and famine, only they referred to the deity as Ra.  Our country is going through this phase yet again with this war.  I know this is nothing new to the Republican party.  Why else would they even bring God into the campaign?  This goes hand in hand with the cheap trick of choosing a woman vice presidential candidate.  It isn’t because she has all this experience the Republicans say is necessary for the new White House (she has quite the contrary; it is arguable that she is less experienced than Barack Obama).  No, it is because she is a female, plain and simple.  It is surprising to me how many white female voters who were in the Hillary camp are now backing John McCain because of Sarah Palin.  They say she is relatable.  She’s a religious zealot who supports mass hysteria in the name of God (like the kind of hysteria of speaking in tongues and rolling in the aisles in her former church.  Have you ever attended a church service like this?  I have, and I can confidently say that I would never vote one of these people into public office if they think God is talking to them and forcing them to throw themselves around the room while swaying and swooning and shouting jibberish.  “Sha-na-na-josenufra shemon!  Vote for me!”).  Sarah Palin is a former beauty pageant contestant with big hair who wishes to deny the reproductive rights of women.  How is that relatable to Hillary supporters?  The only similarity I see here is that we all have vaginas. 

I’ll tell you who can relate to Sarah Palin:  Jake and Elwood Blues.  Like Jake says in The Blues Brothers, “Ya see, me and the Lord have an understanding.”  Jake further says, “YES! YES! JESUS H. TAP-DANCING CHRIST… I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT!”  Sound familiar?  Perhaps Governor Palin should don a black suit, hat and sunglasses.  She can even pose on the Bluesmobile in the swimsuit she wore in the Miss Wasilla pageant, clutching an American flag and propping her Down’s syndrome child– wearing a tunic embossed with the cross of the Crusaders– on her knee for added sympathy points.   

I really don’t see anything wrong with a former beauty queen being the vice president of our country, and I think it does give her a perceived sensitivity towards healthcare needs since she has a disabled child, and I am honestly sorry that her little baby has Down’s syndrome.  What I do see wrong is the unabashed and constant dropping of God’s name and claiming to be part of some divine scheme.  Stick to the political issues, please, and don’t insult my intelligence with this religious mumbo jumbo.  And as far as calling the war in Iraq God’s will– well, I remember the last time Christians invaded the Middle East in God’s name.  It was back in 1095 and was called the Crusades.  No war should be waged in the name of a deity.  Not only is it morally objectionable to impose one’s religious beliefs on other groups of people, but it is just absurd.  What about people who don’t believe in a deity?  How do they justify a war waged on behalf of an invisible man in the sky who can see everything we do and read our minds and who controls the weather and apparently has deep conversations with Republican politicians?

Unfortunately, there are a lot of good old fashioned dumbasses in the US populace, and these people are going to elect John McCain president and Sarah Palin vice president.  What are they going to do when McCain drops dead from old age?  I know I don’t want Sarah Palin as the president of this country I love so dearly.  For the record, I’d rather have Elwood Blues.

It is refreshing to find a TV series that actually has some discernible ending in the underlying storyline, particularly in this day and age where plots are as watered down as a martini in a dive bar and stretched out like nude, bronzed geriatrics on the Riviera – far longer than they should’ve been. I have often found myself silently wishing for an atomic explosion to conclude Tim Kring’s Heroes, or a quick yet violent shoot-out to hurry Prison Break to a final pointless end.

Dexter breaks the current unimaginative mold.  Aside from the television series’ “groundbreaking twist,” there is an obvious depth to the story and characters, which is indicative of it having some root in the literary world. Based on the series of novels by Jeff Lindsay, it was adapted for the screen by James Manos, Jr., an Emmy award winner in his own right. It makes one almost want to take up reading again.

Michael C. Hall shines as Dexter’s psychopathic star. He is a rather brilliant portrayal of an empty shell, meshing the faked facade of common human frailty to a mere veneer to true intent. He finds empathy a foreign, awkward lump, purposely seeking the affections of a woman that is unlikely to encroach on his boundaries of unapproachability.  His only pleasure is in the veiled justification of a vigilante killing, carefully collecting clues to prove the guilt of those untouchable by law – a directive from the cop that found him in a blood flooded cargo container, Harry Morgan.

Even the title sequence is imbued with the heavy hand of subtle mastery. “Splat!” goes the mosquito. “Sizzle!” goes the bacon. Who doesn’t hate mosquitoes? Who doesn’t like bacon? This poor fellow bleeds from a nick whilst shaving – he’s normal – he’s a guy just like me. The sequence ends as the door closes– off to work, smiling, harmless, good old Dexter.

Contrasting the everydayness of the opening sequence, you soon find yourself in the cool, calculating surrounds of Dexter’s murderous rationale – and the exhilaration is palpable. He is the werewolf waiting for the moon before letting his ravenous nature free to savagely cure the cancer that is killing society. It is this crusade that defines the moral acceptability of Dexter to his audience – our thirst for “justice.”

While the true morality of Dexter’s actions is questionable, it is not necessarily a major consideration in the realms of entertainment. Briskly rushing past the prickly point, one can happily amuse oneself with poor, good old Dexter’s conundrums in dealing with the blossoming yet unwanted intimacy of his relationship, the unwanted attentions of the untrusting, dogged Doakes, his fascination with his death art and finally, family. This all as we see the thin outline of normality bleed through the screen.

Definitely delightful Dexter.